30 Jan 2011
Today we shall talk about a favourite topic, “EGO”. It is a favourite topic because ego is the one that prevents you from seeing through yourself. Ego is like a Maya, a barrier, like a veil that prevents you from seeing your true self. Now what is ego? We have talked a lot about it. So let us take new angle of ego. When a child is born, there is no ego because the mind is not yet developed. Whatever you give the child, the child accepts. But when the child reaches the age of about maybe three or four, the mind begins to develop and the child is able to say “this is mine”, “I don’t want this”, Ego has arrived.
This is mine that means the claim of possession. There is attachment to things, that is ego. From then onwards if you don’t check it, the ego will get worse and worse because as the child grows up he will says “this is my job”. “This is my car”. “This is my money”. This is my house”. See how the “mine” comes in. I claim possession to all this things, that’s the ego. I claim possession to my child, my child, that’s ego. I claimed possession to my money, don’t touch it, it is my money, that’s ego. Now that’s material things but when you claim possession to non-material things, “This is my idea” that’s ego. “This is my space”, when you drive your car “this is my space, don’t come into here, don’t come and cross my space.” When you go into the lift, “this is my space, don’t touch me.” That’s ego.
Now let us differentiate between the “I” that we talk about which is not ego. When I say “I am going shopping” that is not ego. I have to identify myself. So although I refer to “I” as myself doing or going to do something, that’s not ego. “I am going to eat” is not ego. But when you say this is my food, don’t touch it, that’s ego. Clearly possession to something is ego. This is what you have to differentiate between because sometimes people will say “I” is ego. No. “I” is not always ego. “I” when you refer to yourself as a person is not ego. “I am going to school”. “I am going to work” Is not ego. But when you claim possession to something then that is ego. Be very clear. Can be material, can be non-material, can be space, can be an idea, that is ego.
Now how do you get rid of this need to possess? Attachment to possession is ego so how do you detach from it. You cannot detach without attaching to something. It is just like you cannot get rid of the negative without replacing it with positive. The only way you can detach from this possession is to attach it with God. Go back to our divine whispers. Think about it, if you claim possession to all these things that you have, your money, your wealth, the children, your title, your fame. Can you bring it with you when you die?. You can’t. So it is not yours. So yet we hold very closely to it, fame, money, children, possession, title, rank, education, PHD, all these things we claim. We can’t bring it with us but how do we get rid of it or detach from it so that we can see our true self. Attach yourself to God.
Your children, are they your children? No. You are only the custodian of your children. The job that you do, whose is it? Does it belong to your boss? Who gave you your job? God. So you are only the custodian of your job. So do it well. If you slowly train your mind to detach from your possession and attach it to God, then you will be able to see your true self, then you are able to move on this path we call the spiritual journey to back to yourself. If you don’t do it and you are always attaching to material wealth and possession, ego gets bigger and bigger until one day it will take over your entire thinking and you will be blinded by your ego without realising it.
The other very interesting thing is privileges. Some people claim this is my privilege. As a parent or as a father, it’s my privilege. Do you know it is your ego. Especially now you have the banks, they classify people into groups – the super-rich in a special privilege group and they give you this special thing, you are privilege this, privilege that, it’s ego. Because it’s my privilege, I claim for it. Its ego isn’t it? So be very careful when you are in a situation where you say it’s my right. It is your ego at work.
They say that the only way you want to get rid of all this things is have humility. See the spiritual journey which we take is nothing more than identifying the ego. Detach from it and attach it to God. You see when we detach from something we need to attach to something else or else it is not possible. It is negative, positive, Ying Yang. There is always this attach, detach. So if you detach yourself from your material possession that you have or the ideas you claim to, you have to attach it with something. So if you have a good idea, say God give me this idea. You see what happens? God gave me this idea. The ego will slowly withdraw. But if you say my idea then you challenge your friend and say “Who says, this is not my idea. It is mine, I thought of it”. Finished! Then ego is very happy and do you know why?, because you claim it is yours. Then the next time ego will give you more chances to make more claims to things.
So, we have to watch this ego like a hawk because for most people, it is ego that controls them. They are not in control of their ego it is ego that is controlling them. We are not controlling our thinking mind. Our thinking mind is controlling us. And then we live through this world believing that, that is it but that is not it. Don’t be fooled by Mr Ego. They say ego is a very clever fellow. Ultimately, if you are able to see through Mr Ego, you are able to see through this barrier, this Maya, this illusion that has been put in front of all human beings. For what purpose? It is to fool you, so you must see through this. Never ever claim that anything belongs to you.
We are just here as students, your wealth, your children, and your title whatever it is, you are just holding it. When you are dead and gone you cannot carry this with you. So don’t hold so strongly to material and non-material things. We have to teach our mind, who is the boss. If you don’t teach your mind who is the boss, your mind will say “I am the boss”. Finished! They say humility will take you to the greatest height of spiritual wisdom. False pride and arrogance will take you to the pits. False pride and arrogance is the ego. Because ego thrives on false pride and arrogance “I am OK, I am the best, I am famous, I am this, and I am that.
So learn to think this way. When I say “I” doesn’t always refer to ego. I am going to eat, I am going to toilet, I am going to school, I am going to work, that is not ego. But when you make claim, example, when you go to the toilet and someone else wants to use it, you say “Hey I am here first you know, you better wait”, that is ego. See the difference? When you line up for the food and say, “I am first in the queue.” You claim your space, “You can queue behind me, as I was here first. That’s ego. But I want eat is not ego. See the difference. Think about it and then you really really understand what ego is.
For the past many years we have talked about ego but today we split ego into two and then you see the difference. Ultimately it is for you to detach yourself from the material things that you have attach to and anchor it to God. Whatever it is, your idea, your children, your fame, your money, whatever it is. Give it to Him “It’s Yours. I am nothing, without You I am nothing. All that I have belongs to you.” And then the ego will shrink. Ego is like cancer, when you give him this Chemo therapy and say “God it’s You” ego will shrink. But if you take the Chemo therapy away, ego will become alive, bigger and bigger, so big that you can’t even see through to yourself. Why? Because it is such a big block you cannot see yourself anymore. When someone says you are wrong, your reply will be “who says so”? You are blinded by your own ego. You will say “Who says I am like that, I am O.K.. You say I am wrong but I am O.K. That’s where ego has become so strong and the person is blinded and can’t see himself anymore.
So remember these two things. When people say “I”, it is not always ego. It’s a big difference between the “I” they refer to themselves when they talk and the “I” that make claim to material and non-material possessions.
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